The following poem was selected as the 3rd place winner of 2021’s Refuat Hanefesh Creative Expression Contest.

Age Group: Youth

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Message from The Author: This is a poem describing what living with OCD feels like.

Every day, thoughts haunt me

Fierce compulsions taunt me

I’m trapped within a war zone

And there’s no way to escape

Fears and worries grip me

False obsessions trip me

I’m trapped by monstrous OCD

There’s no step it won’t take

The crashing thoughts, the crashing fears

The endless struggle, endless tears

My life is not as all appears

Inside, I’m falling fast

The constant struggle, constant fight

My mind is dark, a raging night

And yet there’s still a bit of light

Someday this time will pass

Someday, I’ll be okay again

I know this monster isn’t me

It’s not my fault, this OCD

It’s not my fault this challenge was hand-picked for me, I know

I have my hopes and dreams, I do

I’m still a person, just like you

Just right now, I am struggling to control where my thoughts go

Please don’t judge me

Don’t judge me for symptoms that I can’t control

Don’t judge me because of this part of a whole

I have a disorder

But I am not a disorder

And someday, the raging darkness will disappear

I can do this

I can fight this

And win over OCD

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